seoul 2.0

i know that typically my expectations of myself are high and relatedly, i also know that i can be, especially during times like these--these moments of multi-dimensional transitions--too demanding of myself. (as a recent guideline, i've tried to pay less attention and focus on expectations in general. i've found that the more open and free and "blank" my mind is of any given thing, the more happily observant and grateful i am.) i realized why i was being unreasonably demanding of myself here in seoul version 2.0! it's because this isn't a completely new situation and in the non-complete-newness of it all, i wanted things to be comfortable, as comfortable as my previous existence in korea. for as domestically convenient as that period was, i am reminding myself that that ease and comfort was a result of a cumulative 3 years of seoul living. transitions take time. even when the transitions aren't necessarily totally "new," but are still a big change nevertheless.

it is also precisely that, that non-complete-newness of this year of living in korea that has prompted me to make significant changes. since i have the time to dedicate more time to myself, i think i've created unrealistic deadlines for my creative pursuits in drawing, sewing, and writing. i don't want to waste my time or dilly dally too much. my fear is that i'll stray away from my goals, my hopes and desires of beginning and ultimately accomplishing my artistic aspirations. on the other hand, i don't want to overwhelm myself with unattainable due dates and lose motivation. balance. i'm finding my way.