Saturday, November 17, 2012
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
hand in hand. heart to heart.
Monday, November 12, 2012
the beach is that way! (and this way and that way...)
my students are fabulously creative and insightful. even if they are times, loud and obnoxious, i have to remember that they are, in fact, KIDS! in 4th grade! who isn't loud and obnoxious at 10 years of age?!?
by this time of the year, my students and i have all gotten to know each other well (hard to believe it's already NOVEMBER!) and in addition to laughing about lost in translation moments and silliness in general, we share some really cute and sweet inside jokes!
i have one class in particular (we meet on tuesdays and thursdays) that is always requesting to see my muscles. earlier this year, i took delight in their shocked expressions as i flexed my biceps and triceps. some of them literally screamed--they had never seen such defined muscles on a woman!--while others were speechless. it was quite an entertaining moment!
sometime later, they made another request to see my muscles and i obliged. this time, however, i taught them the phrase "the beach is that way!" and pointed my finger from the left to the right to demonstrate the direction. we all had a good hearty laugh as they mimicked me and repeated the phrase to themselves.
and then! the best part! last week, my student abbey looked at me and said, "teacher! the beach is that way!" only she actually used both of her arms to direct me to the beach! i laughed and replied, "but abbey! is the beach in both directions?!?" when she realized the humor in her motions, she laughed as did the rest of the class. then she explained, "teacher, the beach really is this way and that way!" she referenced a funny korean commercial and changed the lyrics from korean to english to illustrate her point. she said, "this way, that way, this way, that way!" while she was "flexing" her muscles. that jingle caught on quickly in the class and pretty soon, we were all singing, this way, that way, this way that way! so creative, so witty, so sweet!
by this time of the year, my students and i have all gotten to know each other well (hard to believe it's already NOVEMBER!) and in addition to laughing about lost in translation moments and silliness in general, we share some really cute and sweet inside jokes!
i have one class in particular (we meet on tuesdays and thursdays) that is always requesting to see my muscles. earlier this year, i took delight in their shocked expressions as i flexed my biceps and triceps. some of them literally screamed--they had never seen such defined muscles on a woman!--while others were speechless. it was quite an entertaining moment!
sometime later, they made another request to see my muscles and i obliged. this time, however, i taught them the phrase "the beach is that way!" and pointed my finger from the left to the right to demonstrate the direction. we all had a good hearty laugh as they mimicked me and repeated the phrase to themselves.
and then! the best part! last week, my student abbey looked at me and said, "teacher! the beach is that way!" only she actually used both of her arms to direct me to the beach! i laughed and replied, "but abbey! is the beach in both directions?!?" when she realized the humor in her motions, she laughed as did the rest of the class. then she explained, "teacher, the beach really is this way and that way!" she referenced a funny korean commercial and changed the lyrics from korean to english to illustrate her point. she said, "this way, that way, this way, that way!" while she was "flexing" her muscles. that jingle caught on quickly in the class and pretty soon, we were all singing, this way, that way, this way that way! so creative, so witty, so sweet!
abbey! the beach is that way!
abbey and erin! that way, this way, that way, this way!
Thursday, November 8, 2012
storm fun.
this year for halloween, i dressed as a contemporary version of storm from the x-men. inspired by my blonde/silver/violet hair, i felt strong, foxy, and flirty! thanks to yoga, running and a few martial arts classes, i'm in the best shape of my life. not sure how long this body shape of mine will last (life is always changing!) so, here i am, to celebrate determination, fitness, and health!
halloween fun!
this past halloween, for whatever reason (maybe it's because i find it so much fun to dress up and go all out with dramatic theatrics!) i was in super festive mode, dressing up not only as a nerd (did i do that?!?) and storm from the x-men, but, i also went gaga, as in lady gaga! happy halloween!
Saturday, November 3, 2012
mustache and lipstick!
Friday, November 2, 2012
what a wonderful morning! (happy friday!)
this morning, i awoke with a sudden desire to get things done. in the famous words of elvis presley, the king of rock'n'roll himself, i was in "taking care of business" mode. my business included grading tests, cleaning house, and going to my pole dance class!
something wonderful is brewing in the air today--even the bus rides to my dance class were truly...something else. normally, a bus ride to itaewon isn't so full of noteworthy observations, but, today, magic! on the first bus, the driver greeted me with a lovely smile on her face (ooh! a lady driver!--wearing a proper bus driver uniform, complete with a striped tie and vest, sporting a sassy short perm and fuchsia lipstick!--a very uncommon sight!) and proceeded to greet everyone other passenger that boarded her bus. and it wasn't some sort of lame forced greeting--it was joyous every time, like she really valued each passenger's presence. beautiful.
on the second bus, i noticed an older woman--an ajumma--board and i immediately offered her my seat. my backpack, loaded with heavy books, was on the ground next to the seat and instead of simply leaving it there, she hoisted it (after giving me an incredulous look that stated, "what the hell do you have in here?!?") and set it in her lap. i told her that she didn't have to do that, but of course, she smiled and ignored what i said, securing it safely by wrapping her arms around it. kindness given is kindness received.
i'm now sitting in a cozy coffee shop, the sunlight is pouring in from the windows and i'm still happily taking care of business.
happy wonderful friday morning!
something wonderful is brewing in the air today--even the bus rides to my dance class were truly...something else. normally, a bus ride to itaewon isn't so full of noteworthy observations, but, today, magic! on the first bus, the driver greeted me with a lovely smile on her face (ooh! a lady driver!--wearing a proper bus driver uniform, complete with a striped tie and vest, sporting a sassy short perm and fuchsia lipstick!--a very uncommon sight!) and proceeded to greet everyone other passenger that boarded her bus. and it wasn't some sort of lame forced greeting--it was joyous every time, like she really valued each passenger's presence. beautiful.
on the second bus, i noticed an older woman--an ajumma--board and i immediately offered her my seat. my backpack, loaded with heavy books, was on the ground next to the seat and instead of simply leaving it there, she hoisted it (after giving me an incredulous look that stated, "what the hell do you have in here?!?") and set it in her lap. i told her that she didn't have to do that, but of course, she smiled and ignored what i said, securing it safely by wrapping her arms around it. kindness given is kindness received.
i'm now sitting in a cozy coffee shop, the sunlight is pouring in from the windows and i'm still happily taking care of business.
happy wonderful friday morning!
Thursday, October 18, 2012
hair kaleidoscope!
when i've gone on runs along the river, several older korean men stare but return my waves hello! once i was walking on the street and a taxi cab driver, drove super slowly by me, gawking at me from behind the shadow of his sunglasses. and the best, so far, is a conversation i had with an older korean woman. she sat down next to me on the bench at the bus stop and immediately struck up a conversation:
woman: is that your natural hair color?
me: no, it's not.
woman: ah, okay! i wondered why such a young girl like you would have such white hair!
me: yeah, it's not natural, i dyed it.
woman: why did you dye your hair like that?
me: well, i dyed it purple but the color has washed out a lot.
woman: how much did it cost?
me: my friend is a stylist so i was able to get a good discount.
woman: yeah, so how much?
me: i paid 80,000 won.
woman: (aghast) what? you made that much to dye your hair like that? why did you do it?
me: (chuckling) i dyed it because it's fun!
woman: (baffled) because it's fun?!?
me: yeah!
woman: well, i mean you have such a pretty face, but your hair!...
then her bus arrived and i wished her a nice day! i love little entertaining interactions like that! and i love how my hair shifts and changes--so much fun!
Wednesday, October 17, 2012
the big squeeze.
the big squeeze by pema chodron
if we want to communicate and we have a strong aspiration to help others--in terms of engaging in social aspiration, helping our family or community, or just being there for people when they need us--then sooner or later we're going to experience the big squeeze. our ideals and the reality of what's happening don't match. we feel as if we're between the fingers of a big giant who is squeezing us. we find ourselves between a rock and a hard place.
there is often a discrepancy between our ideals and what we actually encounter. for instance, in raising children, we have a lot of good ideas, but sometimes, it's challenging to put together the good ideas with how our children are, there at the breakfast table with food all over themselves. or in meditation, have you noticed how difficult it is to feel emotions without getting totally swept away by them, or how difficult it is simply to cultivate friendliness toward yourself when you're feeling miserable or panicked or all caught up?
there's a discrepancy between our inspiration and the situation as it presents itself. it's the rub between those two things--the squeeze between reality and vision--that causes us to grow up, to wake up to be 100 percent decent, alive and compassionate. the big squeeze is one of the most productive places on the spiritual path and in particular on this journey of awakening the heart.
perhaps it's the shift in weather or the realization that my time in korea is coming yet again to another close, but, lately i've been thinking more about this idea, the squeeze between reality and vision and the moments that cause us to grow and to grow UP. i know that i have tendencies (as do most people--it's the human condition!) to glamorize the ideal job, situation, lover, and yes, even my own identity.
on sunday night, a friend of mine shared with me his ideas of why i'm still single. (ain't nothing wrong with being single! he was you know, just sayin.') it was interesting for me to try to listen without any defensiveness and with an open heart. i'm going to be honest and say that it was difficult to be wholly neutral since i felt that there were certain questionable claims. regardless, there was definitely some truth to his observations. it's true that i have a pretty direct plan in terms of wanting to farm and continue to make farm work my livelihood. it's also true that i am bold, direct and dynamic. it's also true that i'd like someone to fit (ideally) into my life. (what i didn't appreciate is that he made it seem like my wanting a partner fit into my life was such an uncommon thing.) but what's not true is that i'm not inflexible. it made me think about the big squeeze in relationships--how well do we know ourselves and our partners and how we communicate and is that knowledge rooted more in the ideal versus the reality of who we really are? how are we able to accurately make so fine a distinction? i don't know the answers and even if thought i did, the "truth" now wouldn't always be the "truth" later. what i do know, however, is that i appreciate and respect these grey areas of growth, spaces that encourage me to grow up, to be compassionate, and fully awake.
perhaps it's the shift in weather or the realization that my time in korea is coming yet again to another close, but, lately i've been thinking more about this idea, the squeeze between reality and vision and the moments that cause us to grow and to grow UP. i know that i have tendencies (as do most people--it's the human condition!) to glamorize the ideal job, situation, lover, and yes, even my own identity.
on sunday night, a friend of mine shared with me his ideas of why i'm still single. (ain't nothing wrong with being single! he was you know, just sayin.') it was interesting for me to try to listen without any defensiveness and with an open heart. i'm going to be honest and say that it was difficult to be wholly neutral since i felt that there were certain questionable claims. regardless, there was definitely some truth to his observations. it's true that i have a pretty direct plan in terms of wanting to farm and continue to make farm work my livelihood. it's also true that i am bold, direct and dynamic. it's also true that i'd like someone to fit (ideally) into my life. (what i didn't appreciate is that he made it seem like my wanting a partner fit into my life was such an uncommon thing.) but what's not true is that i'm not inflexible. it made me think about the big squeeze in relationships--how well do we know ourselves and our partners and how we communicate and is that knowledge rooted more in the ideal versus the reality of who we really are? how are we able to accurately make so fine a distinction? i don't know the answers and even if thought i did, the "truth" now wouldn't always be the "truth" later. what i do know, however, is that i appreciate and respect these grey areas of growth, spaces that encourage me to grow up, to be compassionate, and fully awake.
Friday, October 12, 2012
run, ji sun, run!
i am happy and grateful to say that at this present moment, i feel that i am in the best shape of my life. i have good blood pressure, my hypothyroid condition is still stable (going on 11 years!) and has not negatively nor deeply impacted my day to day well-being, i eat well, i hydrate, i do yoga and i run.
this past sunday, i ran my first of two 10k races this month. for four weeks prior to race time, i found an online training course aimed at improving my speed and performance. in that duration of time, i ran 4-5 times a week, with speed workouts and easier longer distance runs. i ran along the han river and at the nearby park track, keeping count of minutes loosely and feeling determined to beat my own time of 57:00 minutes from my last 10k race, also in seoul, back in 2010.
what happened floored me! i completed my race in 48:43. not only did i exceed my target time, but, i ran an 8-minute mile pace. 8 minutes! per mile! the inner jock geek in me is literally GEEKING out! i've always been an active person, but, when it came to running, i wasn't always as fast as i knew i could be. i knew that i should keep my goals realistic and in doing so, i completely surprised myself at my own ability to outshine the only person who's time mattered, mine.
i'm still training...hoping to beat my own best personal time for the next 10k at the end of the month. i want to be realistic and now that i feel more confident in my pace, i know i can push myself further, stronger. run! go! RUN!
this past sunday, i ran my first of two 10k races this month. for four weeks prior to race time, i found an online training course aimed at improving my speed and performance. in that duration of time, i ran 4-5 times a week, with speed workouts and easier longer distance runs. i ran along the han river and at the nearby park track, keeping count of minutes loosely and feeling determined to beat my own time of 57:00 minutes from my last 10k race, also in seoul, back in 2010.
what happened floored me! i completed my race in 48:43. not only did i exceed my target time, but, i ran an 8-minute mile pace. 8 minutes! per mile! the inner jock geek in me is literally GEEKING out! i've always been an active person, but, when it came to running, i wasn't always as fast as i knew i could be. i knew that i should keep my goals realistic and in doing so, i completely surprised myself at my own ability to outshine the only person who's time mattered, mine.
i'm still training...hoping to beat my own best personal time for the next 10k at the end of the month. i want to be realistic and now that i feel more confident in my pace, i know i can push myself further, stronger. run! go! RUN!
Monday, October 8, 2012
purple hair!
it's interesting to note that in the last 10 months, my hair has had more color and pizazz than in the previous 5 years. i don't know exactly what has prompted this creative hair celebration, but, i am a big fan! i've always been known to experiment with my hair and luckily for me, if the style doesn't flatter me much, it grows out quickly. this time, however, takes the cake! i have PURPLE hair!
originally, i wanted to go blonde--yes, BLONDE. but once i did, my awesome stylist, sally, suggested purple. i guess she didn't fully approve of me as a blonde but she's a hair professional and one that i admire and trust, so purple (and silver and grey) i went! it's definitely different and fabulously fun.
originally, i wanted to go blonde--yes, BLONDE. but once i did, my awesome stylist, sally, suggested purple. i guess she didn't fully approve of me as a blonde but she's a hair professional and one that i admire and trust, so purple (and silver and grey) i went! it's definitely different and fabulously fun.
before the bleach...
and after!
purple!
my students' drawing of me!
Friday, October 5, 2012
hair crazy!
my students, as lovely as they are, are sometimes prone to over-exaggeration--the dramatically theatrical actress in me LOVES it!--and this is one such example. here they are, in all their shrieks and shrills, reacting to my purple hair!
Tuesday, October 2, 2012
no banana bread for you.
the other day, i woke up annoyed and slightly angry. i've been processing a lot of my thoughts and emotions about ashley and our relationship. right now, i am working very consciously on letting go--letting go of it all. the anger, the sadness, the disappointment.
breakups are never any fun, even when you know it's the right thing to do. there have been quiet moments where i reflect on how much i miss the fun that ashley and i shared. i then, immediately remind myself of the reasons why we are not together, but, there's still a bit of that lingering sadness. i know that this too will pass, but, sometimes, on certain days, inexplicably, i want to be a part of her life. but then again, when i think about the things she's said or done, that feeling is replaced with a gratitude in distance.
one of the things she said to me on the night we broke up is what i suddenly remembered the other day. she said, "i guess i'll never get to eat your banana bread." wow. not, "i'll miss YOU." but i'll miss the banana bread you never made for me. now, this may seem like something not worth getting upset over...but, in one sentence alone, i feel like this encapsulates a large part of our dynamic. in that, she expected me to do things for her--and that she didn't think very much about how her actions affected other people. the immature part of me wants to say, that's right, no banana bread for you. but, i'm working on not being so petty and wishing good things for her. for me. separately.
breakups are never any fun, even when you know it's the right thing to do. there have been quiet moments where i reflect on how much i miss the fun that ashley and i shared. i then, immediately remind myself of the reasons why we are not together, but, there's still a bit of that lingering sadness. i know that this too will pass, but, sometimes, on certain days, inexplicably, i want to be a part of her life. but then again, when i think about the things she's said or done, that feeling is replaced with a gratitude in distance.
one of the things she said to me on the night we broke up is what i suddenly remembered the other day. she said, "i guess i'll never get to eat your banana bread." wow. not, "i'll miss YOU." but i'll miss the banana bread you never made for me. now, this may seem like something not worth getting upset over...but, in one sentence alone, i feel like this encapsulates a large part of our dynamic. in that, she expected me to do things for her--and that she didn't think very much about how her actions affected other people. the immature part of me wants to say, that's right, no banana bread for you. but, i'm working on not being so petty and wishing good things for her. for me. separately.
Friday, September 28, 2012
september smiles!
me and my "mushroom" friend, eunyoung.
reused hanbok fabric, made into hair pins!
fresh basil!
this will forever make me giggle--uranus is a gas giant! (by jackie)
found! a mushroom cup for my mushroom friend!
cookies and ice cream, yum!
feeling strong and fit!
beautiful blue sky!
tasty treats!
min ju, my cousin once removed!
silly faces!
we are so kingly!
butterflies!
butterflies, up close.
red lips!
silly smiles!
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